Salvaging a troubled marriage isn’t painless and, if you sense that the situation is beyond your powers of making up, you should seek help. Now this could necessitate marriage counselling or it could mean reading a good marriage guide to enable you find a strategy that could work for you. Asking friends and relatives for guidance is not advised: they are most likely not relationship professionals and they are very likely to take sides. Meddling by family or friends, however well-intentioned, is apt to make things even more painful. Marriage counselling is a useful possibility, but what if one spouse is reluctant to go that way? Many individuals are reluctant to discuss intimate details of their lives with other people, even if they are well-qualified professionals. In this case, the answer is to take things into your own hands. You may be miserable, full of self-pity and near to panic but you must take control of the situation. The good news is that, once one spouse takes the initiative, an unhappy marriage can be turned around even if the other partner is averse and even hostile.